“Choosy Wives Choose Smith” is a fourth season episode of the animated series American Dad!, set to air on November 2, 2008. The title refers to the classic Jif slogan Choosy Moms Choose Jif.
Plot
After Stan boasts that he has obtained his pilot’s license, Francine begs him not to fly small aircraft. She reveals that she was engaged to another man named Travis who disappeared in a small aircraft before she met Stan. After he reappeared, Francine was already engaged to Stan. Realizing that his wife may have only settled, Stan tracks down Travis and finds he is a wealthy, successful cowboy. He sets up a dinner between Francine and Travis, but Francine repeatedly states she loves Stan and did not settle. Though Stan is satisfied, Roger says that he must be sure (as Stan is the father of Francine’s children), so they fake crashing into the ocean, when they were actually hiding at a remote CIA island. His plan is to disappear for two months and see if Francine remains loyal until he returns, having installed cameras throughout the house to make sure. However, a tsunami hits the island on their second day, destroying everything and reducing it to a tiny desert with only a palm tree. After nearly three months, Stan (who overcomes his fear of sea gulls during this time) discovers that Roger floats effortlessly in water and they are rescued by a passing cruiser. When they return, Francine seems to have moved on, with Travis living with her but then reveals that she easily discovered the cameras and hoped to make him jealous. However, she is immediately taken aback when Stan reveals a tsunami destroyed all his equipment and he became stranded for real. He is convinced, though, that she did not settle for him. Travis is horrified, as Francine didn’t sleep with him and leaves, saying they are meant for each other (insultingly, though the Smiths take it as a compliment).
Meanwhile, Steve takes up the cello to impress Lindsay Cooliage. On the way to practice, he finds an adorable cat on the opposite side of the street. While crossing the road, the cat is hit by a car. When a horrified Steve runs to the animal’s side, he is clawed severely about the face. Steve’s pal Snot says the cat was just frightened, and even manages to pet the cat without being attacked. When Steve attempts to make amends, however, the cat–whom he has named Simon–continues to scratch his face in an increasingly brutal running gag. Steve abandons the cat in a huff. However, he has a dream in which he and Simon are playing complacently together but are then separated, which he takes as a sign.
After his recital, he spots a limping Simon at the auditorium door and presumes that the cat wanted to be with him as he seemingly dies. But he then realizes that he is sleeping, and the cat begins tearing at him. He beats it up several times (including smashing it with his cello until it’s destroyed and dropping multiple elbow drops). The cat is psychotic and brutal, and keeps coming back for more–including posing as Roger’s new toupee (a replacement for a gull named Ira which Roger had befriended back on the island) just to get a last crack at Steve.
Cultural References
- Roger attempts to escape from the island by tying a bunch of seagulls together like James and the insects from James and the Giant Peach only to fail miserably.
- This may also be a reference to the metafiction story The Tales of the Black Freighter, a comic within the Watchmen universe, where a man tries to escape an island after being stranded there by a shipwreck by tying together the bloated corpses of his shipmates. Tales also has a scene where the protagonist eats a raw seagull, much like Stan does.
- The song in the dream sequence with Steve and Simon is I’m Walking This Road Because You Stole My Car (Don’t Go) by Fascinoma.
- The scene where Stan is watching the TV monitors showing the hidden cameras throughout the house is a possible reference to the game Night Trap.
Stan mentions Ritchie Valens’ plane, and “how he would have survived if his plane had just been a little smaller” a reference to The Day the Music Died.
